Do these fellows having whole other secret lives get volume discounts on engagement rings, wedding tuxes, reception hall rentals, and justices of the peace?
The Pipes, the Pipes are Calling Me
There are some very strange noises coming from the basement, either something expensive going on the fritz or ghosts. I’m rooting for the ghosts.
Let Me Transfer You To Our People On Jupiter. They Ought To Be Able to Help You
When long distance was pricey, talk was distilled to its essence: “Remember the hallway? I re-tiled it. Remember my appendix? They took it out. Remember the kids? They graduated. Remember the dog? May he rest in peace.”
The Older I Get the Poorer I Was as a Child
In which old friends get together and revel in falsehoods regarding their youth.
Whatever You Do, Don't Cut the Magenta Wire
Certain occupations are cut off to the colorblind man, managing a paint store, for instance, or dismantling the Bond villain’s bomb.
That Concludes My Opening Remarks and Also My Entire Presentation
Speaking at a public event is so much easier if the audience is fast asleep.
Wedding Tests, a Dangerous Trend
A groom at the altar has enough to think about without having to memorize the Periodic Table of the Elements.